What am i gonna do, huh?

I got alot of things on my mind about whats gonna happen in the future. Im afraid of death occuring to the people i love. I dont kno what im gonna do if my grandparants go away...I lived with them since i was a baby, they got me everything i wanted and takes care of me as if i was their own son. If they p away i dont got no were else to go. my dad died wheni was a baby and my mom is with her boyfriend in a diffreent state and i dont like her boyfriend. i dont want to live with any other reletive. for the past 4 years ive been thinking about this and i allready got whats in my mind. If something happened to them and i was all alone.. You should all ready no whats up...( R.I.P) i cant take this any more. stress is just building up i cant take it any more i dont know what im gona do. i dont wanan talk with them about it and i dont want a nother persaon talking with me about it unless its someone that doesnt realy kno me. i sometimes wish i was never born. i did somethigns that i regret doing and saying.